CHANGE BAD - TRADITION GOOD!!!

Tradition has always been a pretty huge part of the Cleves experience both from a Guest’s perspective and from the Staff’s. Some have been around for as long as I can remember and some only last a few years until we think we have found a better way of doing something. That new way often ends up failing in spectacular fashion and we just go back to what people are used to. In recent years we have tried some new things that absolutely bombed. Hardcore Cleves Guests apparently don’t like major change!

Up until the time I was about 18 one of the best and most popular traditions was the Wednesday night Masquerade Parties that were held in the Club every week during family season. The Dining Room Staff kicked off the fun every Wednesday dinner by dressing up and serving in their costumes. After dinner, Rockin’ Roy Kitchen the greatest 70 year old, Herb Tarleck plaid suit wearing DJ, would spin his records down in the club and all of the staff and guests would go down for the night. It was so much fun. The Social Directors would then offer prizes to the best costumes in various categories like Best Man’s Costume, Best Woman’s Costume and Best Group. The coveted prize was a box of ‘Black Magic’ chocolates, I kid you not!

From as far back as I can remember there was one family who came to Cleves for 2 weeks at the end of July every summer. The most hard core supporters of the Masquerade in the family were the Grandparents and they had to be about 60-65 when this all started. To say that they lived for the Masquerade Nights is a major understatement. I really think they planned most of their vacation around it and arrived with supplies, costumes.... and lots of rum. They were really good to my friends and I as kids and always included us in the planning and made sure we were part of the entire process.

Some of the ideas they came out with were pretty elaborate. One year we went as aliens and painted our faces silver with some paint they pulled out of a suitcase. When I think back on that now I am sure that if I did have kids of my own they might have been be born with 2 heads because of what was lurking in that paint! One year they decided to dress up like the Flintstones where the Grandpa ran around the club wearing absolutely nothing but a giant diaper because he was Bam Bam and his wife proudly followed right behind him dressed like Dino wearing a skin tight black full body suit with a huge milkshake cup over her nose held on with the leg of a nylon stocking, one must never forget that they were in their late 60’s at least!! Watching her do the ‘Bunny Hop’ dressed like Dino was pretty great!. You gotta love the enthusiasm and the fact that they really didn’t care about what asses they looked like...it was all about that box of ‘Black Magic’ chocolates. Down in the Club on the other nights of the week all of the entertainment was held in the big room of the Club and those two would dance every night away. He had the best taste in clothing and would show up about twice a week wearing a hot pink, cream and black zebra print blazer. Excellent. Sadly in the late 80’s Masquerade nights lost their popularity and nobody dressed up any more so we had to cancel them.

To say that these 2 grandparents partied would be a huge understatement. They showed up for their two weeks with the same stuff every year and one of my most vivid memories would be when they hauled out the massive bottles of booze and the little silver metal cups they used to drink it from. They would go down to the club with a mickey stuffed in her purse and crank it up every single night and quite quickly you would notice them go from dancing to swaying to the music. There were many nights when the two of them, still wearing their amazing clothes from the dance would show up in the Staffhouse to play caps with the staff after spending all night down at the club pounding back the booze and waltzing / staggering around the dance floor. After weaving their way up to the staff house from the club he’d sit on the floor of the hall wearing that zebra print hot pink jacket and she’d be in a dress sitting spread eagle on the floor with a beer bottle between her legs. I am sorry but it just doesn’t get any funnier. They were a huge part of my Cleves childhood memories and I was very sad when they passed away. Every time I see somebody sitting at table 19 in the dining room I am a little sad because it isn't them :)

TIMOTHY MICHAEL ROSE

The summer of 2002 was horrific. Business was great and we were 95% - 100% full every night but I had major problems with the staff that year. There was so much damage done to the staff house that summer I think I stopped keeping track at one point. Every single morning I got out of bed and actually dreaded going into the office, it was that bad. Thankfully I haven’t had a summer like that since.

Friday, August 9th, 2002 is a day that forever changed me and everybody that worked at Cleves that year. I was on my way home at about 5:30 pm and I ran into the Corner Store to grab something. It was a beautiful day, warm and sunny without a cloud in the sky. As I walked up to the register to pay for my stuff I saw the 2 trucks from the Minett Fire Department go screaming through the stop sign and head towards Port Carling. I got in my car to head home not knowing that in about 15 seconds my life would be changed forever. When I came around the corner by the ‘Welcome to Minett’ sign, I saw what I can only describe as something that one usually only sees in the movies. There were 2 fire trucks, 3 ambulances, 3 OPP cars and every member of the Minett Volunteer Fire Department about 200 feet in front of me. I got out of my car and walked closer to find out what was going on when I saw 3 of my staff standing on the side of the road. I asked what happened and all I heard was ‘Tim’s really bad.....’. I distinctly remember not hearing another word and I took off running full speed towards the accident and down into the ditch.

Tim Rose a Dining Room Server that summer was riding in a Jeep on a beautiful day heading home to see his family in Waterloo for the weekend. He was with his girlfriend and best friend. When they left Cleves his seatbelt was stuck and he told them to leave and he would get it untangled. Less than 2 minutes later another car coming towards them was driving on their side of the road, the Jeep had to swerve to miss it and they ended up going off the road and down a steep and deep ditch. Tim was thrown from the Jeep. I knew every police officer, fireman and paramedic there that day and they asked for my help to try and get the 2 girls calmed down because they were both very close to going into shock. It is an absolute miracle that neither girl was injured in any way.

When I climbed out of the ditch I was met by one of the OPP officers. We didn’t say it out loud but we both knew that Tim hadn’t survived. The girls obviously didn’t know that and neither did any of the other staff who were there. It was very important that his death not be made known until his family had been notified. He asked me what I needed as he helped me out of the ditch and all I could say was ‘grief counselors at the hotel as soon as possible’. I did my best to try and calm the girls down and they begged me to ride in the ambulance with them but there wasn’t room so I promised to follow close behind.

The next 2 hours were maybe the longest of my life. The girls had been admitted for observation and I was going from room to room to try and comfort them. A physician who was staying at Cleves helped with Tim at the scene and went in the ambulance with him to do what he could. He and I spent our time in the ER just standing with each other, with our heads down holding each other’s hands most of the time. The girls asked me every 10 minutes to go and see how Tim was and to get some sort of update on his condition. Each time I left them I just walked around the corner and did my best just to keep it together. After a few minutes I would come back and tell them they were still working on him. Eventually the ER doctor called me out into the hall and told me they had notified Tim’s parents and that I could now tell the girls he didn’t survive the accident. I distinctly remember telling him as the attending physician it was his job to tell them that. I knew those two amazing girls would resent me for their entire lives if I told them the worst thing they would likely ever hear. Tim’s girlfriend’s parents arrived about 30 seconds later. I went outside, where about 20 Cleves staff had gathered in the parking lot and the doctor took the girls and the parents into the conference room and told them. If I live to be 100 I will never forget hearing the girl’s reaction to the devastating news.

When I got back to Cleves I allowed myself to come totally unglued for a while and collapsed into my Mom’s arms in my office. I remember thinking over and over on the way home from the hospital that there was just too much responsibility involved with dealing with a bunch of kids every summer and for a brief moment decided it was a responsibility that I was unwilling to accept anymore. With the help of a friend, I wrote a letter that was placed on every dining room table at breakfast the next day because our Guests needed to know why every single member of the staff would be hysterical. I had a few Guests come into the office the next day and tell me they would do anything we needed them to do from washing dishes to bar tending, to help us get through it all. We had about 500 guests in the hotel that week and it broke my heart to tell the staff they couldn’t go to the funeral. I had already decided we would have our own Memorial Service for Tim the following Wednesday that his family would attend, which made them feel better about missing his funeral.

The next couple days of my life were totally dedicated to the staff and their emotional needs. They were obviously away from their families and really only had each other to lean on during that horrific time. If you have worked at Cleves before I am sure you can try and imagine what it would have been like if that had happened when you worked here, but believe me, you can’t and there aren’t words to tell you how heart wrenching it was. The morning after he died I went into the dining room at 7:15. I knew I couldn’t help but thought if everybody knew I was just as upset as they were, they might be able to limp through the next few days because we were all trying to cope together. The hardest thing I have ever done in my life was go over to the morning meeting for the children’s counselors that day. I lead everybody out of the Sagamo Centre and we all went and sat outside the colour cube on the ground. I asked the Guests to give us a little bit of privacy while I talked to them, tried to comfort them as best I could and told them about our plans for the Memorial service.

With the help of the Minister from our church up here the Memorial was planned. I invited the volunteer fire department to come to the ceremony and hand yellow roses to everybody after the service. Tim’s entire family came up for it and I remember dreading meeting them. When I introduced myself to his parents they both threw their arms around me and told me how much Tim loved working at Cleves and that they were so glad his last days were spent there surrounded by his friends. His parents still come up twice a year to visit the site and come to the office every time they are here to see me. They are incredible people who will always have a special place in my heart.

After the Memorial service ended, I was on the sundeck talking to Tim’s family and the parents of the girls that were with him in the accident. I could hear a huge commotion off to one side but wasn’t really paying attention until I looked over the side of the sundeck railing and saw at least 50 people swimming. Everybody had jumped off the dock in their clothes. The commotion I heard was them chanting my name. It took me about 30 seconds to run down those stairs, take off my shoes and cannonball off the dock in my suit... then Ted promptly jumped off the dock and did his best to land on me! If you weren’t there you won’t understand this but everybody jumping in the lake was a major turning point. It was at that exact moment that the kids realized life would go on and they were allowed to still have fun for the rest of the summer even if it was with a heavy heart.

The whole event had a very profound effect on everybody who was at Cleves that summer. It forced all of us to bond in a way that quite frankly I never want to experience again. I saw the best in some people, like the Guests who volunteered to help in any way possible, and the Doctor who helped at the scene and ended up at the hospital with me, all of whom ended up becoming great friends of mine. It also brought out the worst in some in people, like the Guest who came into the office to freak out because we cut the kids program short so everybody could attend the memorial (don’t worry, my Dad handled her....). I do have to thank RB for coming with me and being at my side that entire day and night at the hospital. I leaned on you a lot that night but didn't want to put words in your mouth about how you felt during those awful hours we shared. I will always value the support you gave me that day and in the days to follow as I know you had your own team to lead while grieving yourself. As always you did it with class and stoic grace.

Today marks the 8 year anniversary of Tim’s death and like every other year I will go and sit with my Mom on the bench at the Memorial Garden we made in his honour. I will remember the handsome young man I hired, with the amazing smile and great personality who’s brief time at Cleves made such a huge impression on so many people. We were all so much better for knowing him even if it was for such a brief time.